Zhuangzi and the Non-Judgmental Stance in Systemic Constellation Work

In my constellation work, I often encounter a profound paradox:The more we try to analyze who is right and who is wrong, the harder transformation becomes.But as soon as someone is willing to let go of judgment and simply stand within the larger system, insight begins to flow.

This often brings me back to the philosophy of Zhuangzi:“What you believe to be right might be wrong in someone else's eyes. What seems natural to you may have been a forced choice for another.”

As a coach living and working between Eastern and Western cultures, I deeply feel how the wisdom of Zhuangzi harmonizes with the fundamental stance of systemic constellations.That’s why I started reading his work—and here is my attempt to make sense of it for myself and others.

The Core of Non-Judgment:

Only by letting go of right and wrong can we truly see

I once accompanied a mother in a constellation session.Her family had labeled her as “over-controlling.”But during the constellation, she broke into tears and shared: after several miscarriages, she was simply desperate to keep her child this time.For a moment, we all fell silent.It wasn’t about control—it was about deep fear and the instinct to survive.

In systemic constellation work, we don’t ask, “Who is right?”Instead, we ask:“Where is this person positioned? Can they stand in a more grounded and empowered way?”

This directly resonates with a key passage from Zhuangzi’s Qiwulun:

「是亦彼也，彼亦是也；彼亦一是非，此亦一是非。」

Roughly translated:

• “What is this, is also that; what is that, is also this” – emphasizing that things are interdependent and not absolutely separate.

• “Each side has its own right and wrong” – highlighting that value judgments are positional, not objective truths.

In constellations, we do not cut people off through value judgments.We learn to understand behavior through systemic positioning.Zhuangzi reminds us:“What you perceive as right may be wrong to another. What seems obvious to you might have been someone else’s only choice.”

He also wrote something along the lines of:“The more you try to define right and wrong, the further you drift from the whole.”

And that reflects what I experience:The more we entangle ourselves in judgments, the heavier and slower transformation becomes.

Yet if just one person is willing to drop the judgment and simply observe from within the system,life begins to move again.

Seeing the Web of Relationships in the Whole

Zhuangzi also wrote:

「天地與我並生，萬物與我為一。」“Heaven and Earth are born with me; all things are one with me.”

This is not just philosophical—it’s a way of being.The same applies to constellations: what we encounter is often not a single event or symptom, but the complex web of relationships within a larger whole:

• An emotional wound may echo generations of family trauma

• A harmful behavior may serve to stabilize a family system

• A stuck relationship may be rooted in unseen, deeper layers

Once something is seen, chaos can transform into movement.If not, no amount of talking will free us from repetitive patterns.

The Wisdom of Zhuangzi and the Practice of Constellations:

It’s not about finding who is right—it’s about recognizing what is needed.

When we let go of labels of right and wrong, real power lies not in having the answers,but in the willingness to be the one who quietly observes the whole.

Letting go of judgment is the starting point of love—and of connection.

📚 Sources & Inspirations:

• Zhuangzi: Qiwulun (On Equalizing Things), Dazongshi (The Great Master)

• Systemic Constellation Work: Theory & Practice

• My personal journey with cross-cultural constellations and coaching